Money and Love…or Hate

Yes, I’ve been remiss.  Prepping a house for sale and looking for a job have slurped up my creative juices. When you hit a job fair where 15k people show up… When the market’s at 7,000 points… (note: long ago I mentioned that someone (I couldn’t find the source) said 7 ,000 was the point where the market would stabilize. God, I hope so!! Just not seeing the continual slide might help many find just a smidgen of hope that we’d get through this.

But, many aren’t. You can’t be frugal when there’s nothing to be frugal with. And, few things test a relationship as much as an empty checkbook. For many, money is our worth, our value to others. For others it’s a means of avoidance – a new outfit or fancy dinner allows us to skip facing the issues in our life. For still others, it’s a barrier to a relationship, as this funny, but sadly true article shows. Creativity and a sense of humor had no chance against $$$.

Many are staying in unstable, unhappy, unfullfilling relationships out of necessity.   Can’t sell the house. Can’t find a job. Can’t leave. It may be a financial fix, but it’s one that will surely lead to repercussions felt for generations. Frustration, fear, anger, hopelessness – who better to vent at than that SOB spouse you’d leave in a minute if it weren’t for the economy. Love crossses that ever so thin line and turns to hatred. Divorce may be on the slide, but I’m guessing domestic violence will see a big upturn, mostly in terms of verbal abuse, but don’t count out battered bodies along with the scarred souls.

We don’t like to talk about mental health issues in this country. Only the “weak” can’t pull themselves up by their bootstraps ( or whatever cliche you’d like to insert.) Guess what? A lot of strong, responsible, caring human beings will find themselves tested beyond their limits. Some may throw themselves in front of trains, but more of them will throw their pain at others or internalize it and self-destruct (drugs, alcohol, affairs, gambling, over-eating.)

If there’s ever an issue that you can’t be frugal about, it’s your brain. A mind IS a terrible thing to waste. Find a means to shore up your mental health during these horrific financial times. Reallocate dollars and maybe you can try a Relationship Boot Camp. Too steep? Buy the book. Watch Dr. Phil. Search the internet. See what services your community offers. Find a way to save your sanity, if not your relationship.